Friday, February 1, 2013

It takes the Internet....

I'm looking for some advice from the other parents out there.  Here's the issue....

The Boy is bipolar in a way that only toddlers can be (Please note that he is really not diagnosed bipolar I'm just saying that because he is so inconsistent in his behavior.  A hyperbole if you will.). 

So the other night when I got home from work, The Boy was a happy little camper.  He willingly stopped playing with his beloved jeep and came in for the night.  He happily started watching cartoons while I made dinner.  But then the melting began.  He was told he couldn't have more snacks since dinner was being made.  Well that set him off in a whining mess.  Then he wanted a banana, but again was told no.  Melting even further. Polar ice caps people.  He then hit Juanito which earned him a timeout.   

When dinner was ready but he refused to come to the table.  Even when told he could eat a banana with dinner.  He whined and cried for the stupid banana but when handed it, he would throw it across the table.  Not.Good.Manners.  And totally lunatic status.  He continuously pulled on Juanito to get him a "snack." Every time Juanito would go to the pantry and identify the things The Boy wanted but then tell him no.

Eventually, Juanito said it was time for a bath.  He fought that as well.  Now I stepped out of this and cleaned up after dinner so I really missed what happened.  Although, I did see a naked little body run out to the dining room table for the banana.  I continued to hear screaming, but The Boy enjoys bath time so much that most of the time screaming is not unusual. 

When I went to the bathroom to check on everyone, The Boy was naked sitting on the floor with a very angry look on his face.  Juantio was eating the banana.  I tried to  step in but Juanito was already moving ahead with not taking a bath and putting him into pajamas. 

Typically we watch a cartoon (or lately its been Cars or Despicable Me......don't get me started on these movies because I can't stop saying the lines. It is a sickness.) before he goes to bed.  But that night I said oh H-to the-L No.  So we sat in the quiet living room.  Not talking.  The Boy was one fuming mad little man but he did not scream or shout or yell or cry.  He just sat there with a very angry look on his face.  He eventually fell asleep, like within 15 minutes.  I carried him upstairs to his bed and he didn't move until I woke him up the next morning. 

Now these are all just classic signs of being tired and having bad behavior oh and being three.  I get that.  The next day he was a perfect angel which had us asking one another who is that kid?  That's not our kid!  Good swap at daycare Juanito!

Anyways, what I'm asking of you, dear people of my blogging life, how do you handle the co-parenting thing?  What do you do when your partner in parenting  and is handling a situation completely different than how you would?  I see him struggling and failing.  If I step in, like I so often do, it offends Juanito.  It makes him feel like his isn't a good parent, which is so not the case.  But I think, I read a lot, let me help you!  There are different ways of doing this.  Yelling is not the only option!  It seems a little late in the game to be questioning this, but what ever.  Please tell me what to do! 

Oh, and on another note, you know the old adage, its takes a village to raise a child?  I think its more, it takes the Internet.  I read so many parenting web sites, and parenting tips, and how tos and blogs (ok the blogs are more a comfort to know that other people are right there along with me).  So my point is, is the Internet our new village?  (That so sounds like a Carrie Bradshaw line my head right now.)


  1. Mike and I have a rule that we never undermine each other in front of Ryan - no matter what. United front, always. We would rather make a couple parenting mistakes here and there than teach Ryan that we can be divided and conquered. Having said that, there are lots of times when Mike is parenting in ways that I don't agree with (or, like you, I've done more research and have other ideas of methods that might be more effective). In those cases, I bite my tongue, go along with what he's doing and then talk to him about it afterward. Not in a "you don't know what you're doing" sort of way but in a "maybe there's something else we could try" sort of way. And vice versa, because I'm certainly not perfect and Mike doesn't always agree with me either. Anyway, it's working for us for now, but I would imagine it gets harder and harder. So far, we've always been able to agree on our parenting strategies after some discussion. I'm not really sure what we'll do when we have a major difference of opinion.

    This age is so rough, isn't it? I know exactly what you mean when you say that he's an angel one second and a devil the next.

  2. So I don't want to jinx anything (and of course by merely typing that I have, but I think we're through the current rough patch! The Nos are less frequent and the giggles and willingness is back! We'll see how tonight goes!