Friday, January 27, 2012

Handful of Blessings to Foster Your Own

As I have touched on a time or two, The Husband and I struggled with fertility.  We worked for a year before we got pregnant.  I had a very uneventful pregnancy and in a wild flare of drama at the end we successfully had Levi.  Looking at our lives before and after him, I am repeatedly reminded how luck we are to have this little tornado in our lives. 
While we dealt with our fertility, I took refuge and comfort in an online community of other women diagnosed with PCOS.  I made many friends during our time there who I still keep in contact.  Some went along the pregnancy route along with me and others stayed among the TTC (trying to conceive) to become the AARP of TTC and some jumped to the adoption threads.  How ever their individual stories evolved, I have been blessed to have these very inspirational women along with me on my own path.  While I don't know these women, couldn't pick them out of a line up or know what their voices sound like, we shared very intimate details of an emotional journey.  They were there for me all along the way to share the hurt and disappointment and to tell me in no certain terms that I could get back up and keep going. The best part, when I go back there I am still accepted without question. 
I have one friend who started her fertility journey a little bit before me and announced in November that she was very excitedly expecting twins in June.  Today I found out that she prematurely delivered both boys who died shortly after.  Words will never be able to express the sadness I have for her.  The guilt I have for having successfully gotten pregnant and delivered a healthy baby.  I feel blessed to have him and want to give a handful of that blessing to her. 
We are faced with crappy things every day.  Unemployment, bills, debt, traffic, anxiety, health, bad relationships.  So many things that make it hard to remember that we have really great things, big and small around us.  I don't want my friends to suffer losses big and small so that I can remember all that is good in my life.  So here are some good things I remembered this morning....
1. My husband is a great person who not only gets my humor but laughs out loud. And he would totally go to couples counseling if we needed it.   
2. My hair these days looks awesome the day after washing it
3. I don't work Fridays!
4. Friends are the people who like you for who you are and want to share their life with you. Even if you don't have things in common.
5. Levi brushed his teeth without a fight this morning.  With three different toothbrushes.
Last but not least...

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