Naming conventions and distance

So the Christmas decorations are down and packed away. Alice, our Elf on the Shelf, is hibernating comfortably in her box until next year. The Christmas tree is drying out even further in the back yard ready to be cut into fireplace logs soon. 

Comparison

1. What did you do in 2012 that you'd never done before?

Attempted to be a stay-at-home mom and realized that that job ain’t for sissies or the mentally unstable.  Good thing I found a jobby job.  I also realized a goal of doing something I like while working for a company that is working towards making the world a better place, even if it’s just through water and sewage.  I also willingly vacationed with my family-at-large and successfully maintained my sanity. A truly surprising accomplishment. 

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I rarely make them because I rarely keep them so…nope. J

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

No babies this year…we shall see what next year brings!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No deaths either, which is probably good since we had our fair share of them in 2011 and 2010.  May we keep the 2012 streak alive!

5. What countries did you visit?

Well, if you count Nebraska as other country there’s that.  If you don’t then I didn’t travel outside of the US.  We went to Nebraska and California, which is a staple in our lives.

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you didn't have in 2012?

A pregnancy and perhaps a baby.  Other than that I feel like we have so much.  So again, can we keep the 2012 streak alive in that aspect too?

7. What dates from 2012 will be etched upon your memory, and why?

I can't remember dates to save my life so probably none of them.  Sorry significant event that I'm not remembering right now. 

 

8. What was your biggest achievement of this year?

Work.  Finding a company that I am proud to work for who appreciates its employees enough to think of their comforts above all else.  At times I feel like I am capable of more but then I realize that everything is good.  Don’t mess with a good thing and more will come.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I think my biggest failure started in 2011 when I made the choice to leave my Hell employer for a pipedream that was NOT dreamy and short lived.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nothing crazy thank God!

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I have no idea.  Honestly we didn’t buy anything too exciting.  Or at least its not exciting any more.  But really I think financial stability has been a great accomplishment.  Starting the year off unemployed makes that whole thing a shaky thing. 

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

I’ve got two to celebrate here.  First my relationship with AJ is like a 1000 times better than it was a year ago.  So I feel like celebrating the efforts on both of our parts because of this.

Second, Juanito and me as we continue down this treacherous path of parenthood I am continually surprised at our ability to handle it together. 

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Society.  I could name people that I actually know but that seems rude especially if they don’t read this.  So I’m going with society in general.  Between immigration debates, the Presidential elections, gun control debates and the looming fiscal cliff and all the finger pointing that goes with it I am appalled. 

14. Where did most your money go?

Bills, mortgage, car payment, vet bills, medical bills, fertility docs, and a little bit of travel.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Walden.  Even though I was nervous (well beyond nervous) about spending so much time with my family-at-large I was so excited about finally attending a summer camp. 

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?

Ok so I guess its supposed to be Call Me, Maybe but there are so many others to choose from! 

Fun. – Some Nights.

Rhiannon –Diamonds (I don’t know why but it just does for me)

 

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

Happier: way happier!  I’m not paralyzed with fear on my couch worrying about how I was gonna pay my mortgage let alone put gas in my car!

Thinner: Fat.  Way more depressed

Richer: Monetarily yes (see happier) and emotionally but really I think that might be thanks to the whole unemployment thing.  I am more grateful therefore richer.  Does that sound like a fortune cookie or a Psalm?

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Probably worked out.  I think I might always feel this way after the holiday season though.  Gluttony means depressed shopping at Old Navy which is a new holiday tradition.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Eat.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

With my family.  With all the bitching and therapy I do when it comes these guys, I still love being with them.  Even if it means I don’t really love myself. Oi, I should call Dr. Curmudgeon soon.

21. Did you fall in love in 2012?

I think I fall more and more in love with Juanito as the years go by.  So yes, yes I did.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Revelations (or Revolutions for those who don’t like in this house) became a reluctant must-watch in this house.  As well as Parenthood (because it ain’t Tuesday unless you’re crying on the couch) and Duck Dynasty because I want Uncle Si in my family.  (He would seriously blend in.)

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

Well this is just a bad idea to answer.

24. What was the best book you read?

Shelter Me made me cry like no one’s business. It touched on my biggest fear as a mother and wife.  I loved every character.  Oh and the whole Hunger Games Trilogy.  Don’t hate me, but I loved it.  Hopefully the fact that I haven’t read nor seen the Twilight Saga will redeem in some eyes. 

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

The Lumineers. Fun. Florence and the Machine, oh Vampire Weekend!  Spotify!  All of the DMB Live Traks that Juanito got me for Christmas.

26. What did you want and get?

The chance to try for a baby, again.  I wasn’t sure it was in the cards for us this year.  Thankfully it’s a big deck.

27. What did you want and not get?

The pregnancy but we’re still working on it.

28. What was your favorite film of 2012?

All year long?  Man I can’t remember every movie I’ve seen.  But I will have to say that hunger Games is one of most anticipated movies of my life.  Catching fire comes out in 2013 so that’s promising!

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 34 this year and I still have to do the math to remember it.  But I ended my Jesus Year and started my “mid-thirties.”  I celebrated in Carlsbad and will continue to do so until I don’t celebrate birthdays.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Adding Powerball Winner to my accomplishments.  Money doesn’t buy you happiest but it allows you time to create it for yourself!

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept of 2012?

Cardigans and flats.  I quit the charade of wearing heels.  Flats allow me to be nimble and fashionable.  I will weep when ballet flats go out of style.

32. What kept you sane?

Juanito, Schmacey, Schmaren, other various friends, AJ and The Boy.

33. What political issue stirred you the most?

Oy, where to begin….  Women’s health, abortion, immigration (I live in Arizona I can’t help it), same-sex marriage, Obamacare.  The older I get the more riled up I get about political issues.  I foresee that I will be the 60 year old who is occupying Washington. 

34. Who did you miss?

Those who have passed.  If you’re too far away from me in miles, I can call you, exchange pictures and texts and parts of our lives in tidbits.  If you’re gone forever I will never have that chance again.

35. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Imagine that we could get it together
Stand up for what we need to be
--Dave Matthews Band “Mercy”

holidays make me crazy

I recently read this article and thought what if the general public got to weigh in how I was doing in my roll of being a wife and mom.  I think this week I might have a very low approval rating.  Spending so much time focused on the family-at-large during the holidays makes me, well, crazy.  I have been a bitter ass to deal with.  I acknowledge this.  I don't know how to not be because this is most definitely a coping mechanism. 

Juanito, please bear with me and it will be over soon. 

Unmentionable

Since its only November 29th, I'm not allowing myself to go all mistletoe, snowflakes and reindeer on your asses. The level of self-restraint I'm practicing here is mind boggling. But I will share this....

I love the segway from Thanksgiving to the holiday that I'm not mentioning yet.  Just so you know, I order my Unmentionable picture and am writing my Unmentionable letter.  Juanito got the Unmentionable decorations down the other night and started putting up the Unmentionable lights with the assistance of The Boy.  Also we're picking out the Unmentionable tree tomorrow so we can blow up Unmentionable, Gangam-style, on Sunday. 

You've Been Warned

Such a big weekend and there are so many stories to tell….where to begin? First, Thanksgiving parade with The Boy was fun. He loved Charlie Brown but mainly because he had a football. I don’t think he understood that they were ginormous balloons. Since we were up early, we watched the CBS coverage of the parade, which is NOT the Macy’s Parade. Kind of a letdown if I am to be honest. The rest of Thanksgiving was a jumble of family and list making and researching the ads and researching again. Needless to say, The Boy did not nap. So we played and watched movies and ate chips and dip (actually we filled up on chips and dip) and went through the ads, or at least I did.

After dinner we did not stick around for pie because I had a date with Schmacey and Schmaren at 7 pm at my house. We were loaded with sale bills and lists and ready to go. We hit up Walmart, Target, Kohls and Old Navy before dropping dead due to exhaustion at 2:30 am. Schmaren was back up at 4:30 am to go to Cabela’s. God bless her sleep-deprived heart. But I was successful in getting ALL of my Christmas shopping done. Everything! Everyone! There is such a sense of accomplishment that I can’t begin to explain. This is why I do Black Friday. Yes, there is pushing. Yes, there are lines like nothing I would ever contend with. I don’t drive on freeways during rush hour because I hate lines. But there is something about the camaraderie of complete strangers that makes this congestion tolerable. The method we’ve created is that one person hangs out with the cart and the other people go out looking for a few items. So in Walmart I hid in the bedding isle and Schmacey and Schmaren kept returning with new things. Schmaren brought back six Monster High dolls because Schmacey and I both needed one and she wasn’t sure which one so she grabbed two of each. This was how we rolled through each store. And man it was fun. Despite the rather ghetto man in line next to me in Walmart who kept telling this story of how he was threatening people for the scooters (scooters? Really? This is what we brawl over?) And the unfortunate number of people who decided that the holidays meant no bath, it was fun! The back end of Schmacey’s Yukon was packed almost to the top and damn I was tired when we made it home. (Seriously felt hung over the next day) but I so enjoy those two girls and any time spent with them is a blast.

After sleeping forever (Thank you Juanito!) we got all gussied up (yes I sound like my Grandma there) and went downtown for our family photos. I am playing around with those and will order my Christmas cards soon. Maybe tonight depending on the Cyber Monday sales. After photos, Juanito headed out of town with some friends for a weekend at The Dunes. He was reluctant to go because of the drive, but I pushed because we parents need breaks from being the roles that we accumulate as we get older. Some times we just need to be us and if that involves quad at high speeds through the sand dunes of the Mohave desert, then so be it. As long as he comes back in one piece and with a smile that is all I ask. And he did.

The rest of the weekend I spent with my niece Red and we had a glorious time. I’ll write about that later. So another successful Black Friday under my belt – yay! I normally refrain from too much Christmas until the first of December, but be warned it’s my most favoritest holiday of all.

The Plan

So for the next few days I get to steep in family, food, fun and shopping. This is my thanksgiving weekend! Here is the plan:

Cinnamon rolls and the Thanksgiving parade. We don’t leave until Santa shows up! I’m curious to see if the parade will be entertaining for The Boy this year. After the parade we start the holiday madness.

First we head out to my parent’s house where I will force everyone to go through the sale bills and make their Christmas lists. These lists will be typed up and distributed throughout the family because come December 18th Dad is gonna ask, “What does your mother want for Christmas?” and I can tell him to check out the list. While some people’s lists have been a few columns long on legal paper (Cee) others have only had three items (GG). Before their Thanksgiving dinner is served at noon we will skedaddle out to Juanito’s parent’s house. There we will put The Boy down for a much need nap and gorge ourselves on chips and dip. I will plan my shopping adventures that are starting earlier and earlier these days. When The Boy wakes up we will do our thanksgiving dinner. We will promptly leave because I’ve got a date with Schmacey and Schmaren to stand in line for Monster High Dolls and Legos and , according to the Christmas angels I pulled from the Christmas tree at work, a Dream Light pillow pet (dog) and Barbie and accessories (because that bitch never travels light). Oh and then Cabela’s because apparently that scope is a good deal and if you’re gonna get Chad one I want one too…..

If we sleep then we‘re lucky, but if not that’s how we roll. God speed all my other Black Friday Shoppers

Thanksgiving Post

As it is Wednesday before Thanksgiving I thought I would cast aside my doom and gloom postings that I’ve been having lately and focus on fun and giving thanks. And in by doing so I want to look back on a few Thanksgivings.

The Early Thanksgivings
Growing up in Nebraska for the short time that I did I very distinctly remember holidays. They were split between my grandparents’ homes, Thanksgiving at Grandma A’s house meant Christmas at Grandma and Grandpa’s house asn that switched every year. Grandma A’s house was a little white house that had two bedrooms and an attic that was scary and fun. The front porch was pretty empty since the door that every entered through was the enclosed back porch. I found out later that the porch and the bathroom where added at some point after my Dad was a kid. Its hard to imagine that my Dad had an outhouse. Anyways, my Dad’s family is on the bigger side, seven boys and one girl, my Dad is the youngest. When we still lived in the town that my Dad was born in (and we were born there too) I had a few uncles and their families who lived in the same small town. But come the holidays pretty much everyone came home. I remember Grandma's long drive way being jam packed with cars as people drove in from other places and my cousins, being significantly older than me, had their cars too. What that house must have looked like from the road, teeming with people.

In the house crammed Uncle Verne, Aunt Marilyn, their boys Greg and Brad; Uncle Von and Aunt Gwen and their kids Holly, Heidi and Heath, Aunt Maryann and Uncle Dave from Lincoln with their daughters Kelly and Lori; Uncle Richard and Aunt Bobbie also from Lincoln with their daughters Angie and Joni; Uncle Joyce and Aunt Laura rarely made it out to the eastern part of the state for the holidays but when they did they brought their boys Mark, Steve and Danny. Uncle Gale and Aunt Adell would drive down from Minnesota a few years and bring with them Chad, Todd and Ryan. Then Uncle Gary and Aunt Jan would drive down from Omaha with Trevor and Shannon. Add in our family of five and that brought the grand total to 38 people all crammed into a little white house on the other side of the train tracks.

Growing up everyone smoked because it was the 80s and that’s what everyone did. I remember a vast majority of the adults would be on the little porch where it would be cold since it wasn’t insolated but ventilated for the smokers. Everyone brought a dish and the dining room table would be covered in a smorgasbord of food. When the food was ready Grandma A, decked out in her holiday polyester pants and sweat, would gruffly tell everyone to “come and eat.” My aunts would sing the Doxology with a few kids joining in and the men shuffling their feet and my Mom would inevitably harmonize because she can’t stop herself. Then it was men first and then kids and then the women to fill their plates. Card tables were set up where there was room and if you got a seat you must be higher up on the ladder than others. I remember eating on the floor at the coffee table with my middle sister a lot. Writing this now I can smell the bread baking and heard the floor boards creak with the weight of rambunctious kids. I can hear the different conversations and smell the smoke that would waft in from the porch. I hear my Mom’s voice telling a story (she’s a good story teller) and the laughter above all else.

We say that my Dad’s family isn’t very communicative or demonstrative in their love, which is true. But these memories I hold dear to me because they are the foundation of my Thanksgiving. It doesn’t matter where you are as long as you’re surrounded by family or those you call family.

A Sunny Thanksgiving

The first Thanksgiving in Phoenix was hard for my parents I think. I was nine and as long as I was with my family I guess I didn't know any better. But my mom missed her parents and I think my dad missed his family and I think that void was felt by everyone, even Muffie our family dog. My Mom tried hard to make the day festive, even when I know her heart wasn’t in it. To add to the lack of family, the weather didn’t help much. It was in the upper 70s making the sweaters that we would have normally worn with turtle necks and corduroys stifling. We had our turkey dinner on a picnic table in our back yard under the one sad little tree and the blazing sun. My middle sister and I made pilgrim bibs for everyone to wear, God bless us, even Dad wore one. This was the year of that Mom was attacked by the Indians (she walked into a tree branch and it scratched her face). It also started the tradition of calling home for the holidays. 

This year it will be 80 degrees for Thanksgiving Day.  Its hard to get in the holiday mood for so many when its vacation weather.  But honestly, while I have great memories of Thanksgiving in Nebraska, this is how Thanksvgiving is for me.  Shorts and flip flops and turkey and stuffing, they all go hand in hand. I've had Thanksgiving in Nebraska as an adult and while it was toasty and warm, it wasn't better.  I was still with family and we still ate way too much and laughed too loudly and planned our Black Friday shopping.

The Next Level
As the years went on, my family created our own traditions and our own sense of Thanksgiving sans snow and chilly weather. Once Juanito and I started dating, seriously, that meant combining holidays. It was at this point many many years ago that I said I will spend Thanksgiving with your family as long as I get Christmas morning with my family. I didn’t know that I set precedence for years and years to come. So Thanksgiving of 2002 was spent with my future in-laws. It was strange to say the least. There weren’t mounds of food that my Mom always prepares even when they say the budget won’t allow it. There wasn’t the constant noise of kids and the hustle and bustle of people and dogs and comings and goings and animated conversations and football games turned up so that someone can hear it over the noise. It was just us, my in-laws and my sister in law and her boyfriend at the time. It was calm and quiet and just different. There was no turkey, instead like a turkey roll. There weren’t enough of us to warrant a full turkey I guess. The TV was turned off and music was played and wine was served, but we were all in relaxed clothes, nothing dressy or fancy. I was so on edge being with his family that I didn’t appreciate it until I went back to my parent’s house the next day and the majority of the family was still there being loud and running amok. I realized that constant commotion is not necessarily part of Thanksgiving. And while it might make it fun, so does giving your future mother in law too much wine ‘cuz it makes her silly.

So where ever you are this Thanksgiving, stuck in a too small house with too much family, or braving your new traditions or getting drunk with your family, may you be surrounded by love and thankful for your surroundings.

I'm a Planner

I've got the blahs.  I don't want to do much of anything.  Which is kinda funny or ironic (I'm never really sure since that Alanis Morrisette song) since my sister, AJ, called me Ms. Planner this morning.  I plan things. All sorts of strange things are planned because I'm a planner.  I feel like if you don't plan it, it won't happen.  So instead of being those people who talk and never do anything, I plan. I would not say that we must be on the go at all times like Schmacey, but that's because I plan our down time too. 

This past weekend we had a very uneventful few days and it was intentionally planned like that.  We ordered Chinese take out on Friday and Juanito rented movies and built a fort in the living room with the boy.  The three of us watched The Lorax but really I watched The Boy watch The Lorax.  He was attentive at most of the areas.  When the Once-ler first finds the forest, The Boy squealed and clapped his hands.  his little celebration was too much!  He danced to the music, because thats what he does.  Anyways, it was very low key Friday.  Saturday was just as memorable.  After gymnastics at the community center, complete with our first fire drill, we went home for a three hour family nap.  Yay!  We took a late afternoon drive out to see Grandma and Grandpa where The Boy ran amok for a while, sans socks in the cool rainy weather.  That night, after The Boy went to sleep I left Juanito to play video games and went to hang out with AJ at Cee's baseball game.  Mind you it was pretty damn cold for Phoenix so I froze my ass off bundled under Red's Hello Kitty blanket.  Sunday was a day of laundry and dozing.  After running amok at Grandma's house without socks in the cold cold weather it was TOTALLY shocking that The Boy ended up with a slight fever and a sluggish disposition. 

A lazy weekend was just what is needed as we gear up for the holidays.  Today my mind is a mess of other thoughts that don't come to fruition.  So I'm working on my list of what to get who for Christmas. Doing some online research.  I'm starting to scout out the Black Friday shopping.  I've even recruited a friend who is super competitive which is a great skill when it comes to Black Friday.  I am not a competitive person, but I am a planner.  But for now I'm on hold, but planning to do something later.